There's nothing more crushing than finding out someone is cheating on you. It's the end of everything: a relationship you thought was going well, all that time and hard work you put in to make it work, and all your self-confidence and the ability to trust people. Gone in an instant, through no fault of your own. Worst of all, it almost always comes as a complete shock. But there are many, many ways to tell if she is playing the field behind your back, so you can be prepared for the worst. If your girl is doing any of these, it's time to start packing your bags... According to relationship experts, #38 is a SURE sign she is cheating on you.
1. She's Acting Like A GPS Tracker
There's a number one trick to cheating: don't get caught. As long as you never get caught, you never have to confront those ugly feelings or all the pain you're inflicting on your partner. And this may be blatantly obvious, but the key to not getting caught is to not be in the same place as your partner while you're cheating on them.
If she's started tracking your movements all of a sudden, then this could be the reason why. Is she suddenly extremely interested in where you're going to be during the day, at what time, and for how long? Well, it's not because she finds your activities fascinating, or even that she suspects that you're cheating on her. The most likely explanation is that she's trying to make sure you're not around to catch her.
2. There's Some New Sexy Underwear
On the list of things that men generally care about, new and good-looking underwear is right down the bottom in around the same position as quinoa. We just don't care - once you're down to your jocks, there's no going back anyway. Women, on the other hand, wouldn't be caught dead in granny pants when they're looking to get hot and heavy.
Sexy underwear has a way of making them feel hotter and more desirable, as much psychological as it is a matter of appearance. Putting some lingerie on is a statement of intent. So if you spot a few pairs of lacy new things in the drawer (and you're sure they're not to spice up your relationship), it's a good sign that she's expecting to get frisky in another bedroom.
3. Her Fitbit Is Getting A Workout
Now for a sign that's 100% backed by science. The number-crunchers at UCLA performed a study of fitness and relationships, and they found one surprising correlation: women who are looking for new partners walk around more than women who aren't. Why? Nobody really knows, although the most likely explanation is that they're trying to lose weight.
And that's a bad sign. If your lady's usually the fitness freak, or she's been talking for years about shedding some pounds, then that's fine. But a sudden and unexplained interest in losing weight is not fine at all, especially if you've already told her numerous times that you love her the way she is. Chances are that slim new her is intended for a return to the dating scene.
4. Her Phone's Getting More Love Than You Are
This is - how do we put it - more of a global problem than one just restricted to cheaters. Everyone these days is ignoring everyone else in order to pretend to talk to everyone else. It's a strange situation when four people together in a bar are spending their time silently and furiously messaging people who aren't in the bar, but you're not alone, buddy.
There is, however, a time and a place for this kind of thing. And when it comes to romantic relationships, there's a definite line that can be crossed. If she's doing it while you're trying to have a romantic picnic, or it's the first thing she grabs for in the morning instead of you, it might be time to literally and metaphorically pack things up. Clearly there's someone on the other end that's getting her undivided attention.
5. Her Friends List Is Full Of Strange New People
Pop quiz: how many real new friends have you made in the last year? For most of us, the answer to that is a resounding "not many". We've already got a solid circle of friends, and are generally too busy for the big emotional investment that's required to get a new buddy. Besides, how on earth are you meant to get a new friend anyway? Ask them out on a let's-be-friends date?
Some women, of course, are natural social butterflies and will be racking up new friends and fresh faces like it's going out of fashion. In that case, it's not unusual to see a couple of new names on their Facebook feed or commenting on their Instagram photos. If those new friends seem to be taking up a lot of her time, though, and she's never talked about them or invited you to meet them, you've got a reason to get suspicious.
6. It's No Longer "We"
Every relationship - yes, yours too - will go through very specific phases. First you start off in the honeymoon phase, where you're stuck to each other's side like glue. Then you hit rock-hard reality, and you discover you'd really rather spend Saturday nights out with your own friends. Finally, you accept the fact that you love this woman and it's just going to be comfortable. Nothing more, nothing less.
For the first stage, everything is "we". For the second, all you can talk about is "I". But when you're basically married, it then becomes "we" again. The two of you have basically morphed into one indistinguishable lump of a couple. That's why when she starts saying "you" and "I" again, it's time to get worried. This is stage four: she no longer thinks in terms of the two of you together, which might mean that she's thinking in terms of someone else entirely.
7. Her Plans Don't Include You
Guys, do you sometimes feel like you're just your girl's fashion accessory? Do you feel like you're being dragged to weddings, birthdays, and family functions just to nod and laugh at all the right places? If you just screamed "yes!", then good news: you're still a part of her future. You've got plenty more nights of forced socializing to come.
If her invitations have dried up, and you don't even have something you absolutely have to come to or else in the next couple of months, then you're in trouble. There's three possible reasons: either your jokes have been terrible lately, or no-one in the world is having a birthday, or she's planning to dump you. Or a fourth, even more terrible, option: it's slipped her mind because she's busy daydreaming about having someone else on her arm.
8. She's Throwing Smoke Bombs
Most dudes should know what a smoke bomb is, but for those who are a little less underhanded than the rest of us, let us lay it out for you. A smoke bomb is basically any kind of misdirection that'll deflect attention away from the real topic. We're talking tantrums that come out of nowhere, counter-accusations, and completely irrational behavior.
Recognize any of those? You should, because it's a classic move, straight out of the cheating-man playbook. Women are fully capable of doing the same, though, so you should be on the lookout. If a conversation or some innocent questions suddenly take a sharp U-turn, then you've gotten close to a painful truth - one that she doesn't want you to know.
9. She Doesn't Answer Certain Phone Calls When You're Around
Sure, some people just don't like answering the phone anymore. For most other people, though, a ringing cell phone is just way too hard resist. Hell, no-one can resist a WhatsApp notification for more than seven seconds - imagine if it's a matter so "urgent" that it requires a phone call. Imagine what kinds of super juicy gossip could be waiting on the other end of the line.
No, there's only one real reason why she wouldn't take a phone call: because you're in the same room as her, and she doesn't want you to overhear what she's saying. Or who she's talking to. And the only reason that might be is she's organizing you a surprise birthday party, or she's organizing some hot action for herself on the side.
10. If She Leaves The Room When The Phone Rings, Be Warned
We've talked about her ignoring calls, but actually answering the phone then leaving the room is one step up from that. Again, there could be a legitimate reason for it, like she's secretly buying you that 30ft yacht you always wanted. But if there's no reason for it, then it looks like this is definitely the end of the road.
You should read this kind of behavior as essentially saying that she doesn't care about you anymore. She no longer has the decency to take her infidelity and keep it outside of the house, and she couldn't give a flying penguin whether you know about it or not. Why would she be so brazen? Well, that's a strategy in itself - to make you do all the dirty work and break up with her. So you're the bad guy.
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