All relationships have their own peculiar set of problems but there are yet some particular fights that can be said to be common to almost every relationship. It is important to be able to recognise the common fights as that will be a first step in addressing the problems.
1. Her Family Doesn’t Like You
You will be one hell of a lucky person if you find that your in love you just as much as you love them. For the people unfortunate enough to fall in a different category, take a deep breath and mind your manners because this is an argument that’s not worth having.
Chances are, her dad thinks you’re not good enough for her, her mum might be a nag and her brother might be a macho fellow that barely knows his right from his left. Irrespective of these things, her family were in your partner’s life long before you surfaced and they will be around when you leave.
Even if you’re sure they don’t like you, avoid heat-of-the-moment insults as the only thing that will achieve is opening deep wounds that will only fester and destroy your relationship.
2. Spending Too Much Money
When you’re single and not in a relationship, your money is entirely yours. Same however can’t be said for when you’re married or in a long term relationship. You’re answerable to your partner regarding your spending.
More so, ‘Fiscal infidelity’ which involves lying about how much you earn and spend has the potential to betray almost as much trust as infidelity of the physical kind. As such, if you maintain a joint account with your partner, it’s best you use it for payments like rent and other related bills.
You should however retain individual stashes that each of you have full control over so there’s no bickering over a round of drinks you paid for or the umpteenth pair of shoes you couldn’t say no to.
3. Failing To Help With House Chores
This is perhaps the most tedious fight with the easiest solution. All you need do is delegate tasks with each one of you picking chores one by one. It is however important to show appreciation for each other’s efforts. If your partner spends two hours cooking your favourite meal, remember not to gloat or make fun of how you spent just 10 minutes doing the dishes.
4. Failing To Have Enough Sex
This is another common fight that usually simmers under the surface in relationships. It is awkward to bring up, despite the fact that it is easy for partners to feel resentful or worry if the other person finds them unattractive, especially if they are not open about the their expectations in bed.
It is important you have a frank conversation about what you need in the intimacy stakes. Take every opportunity you have to get intimate, there is no better way to release that simmering tension than to have the sex you’ve been fantasising about.
5. You Feel They Are Controlling
A lot of relationships thrive on the fact that both persons involved have different personalities. While one person might maintain passionate and particular views regarding how the wardrobe should be arranged, the other person might be happy to go with the flow.
It is however important to know that you both have an equal vote on the important issues otherwise resentment will crop up. A serious power mismatch that sees one partner micro-managing every aspect of the life of two persons only creates conflicts.
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